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“Thrown Under The Bus!”
“Thrown Under the Bus” is “Automotive Slang,” “throw under a bus” — Sales talk for selling someone a car or van with all the extras and options at full sticker price or better.”
It is getting sold a lot of what you really don’t want for a price you never intended to pay!
When I read the two posts by Hanto Jatta and Adelina about the aphorisms that produce indifference, Hanto put it “killer indifferentists” (It is an actual word!) Both of your posts put light on conversations that I could definitely identify sometimes on a daily basis.
I asked myself, “who do I become when these conversations capture me?”
Immediately the word “Cynic” occurred to me. So, I looked up the word “Cynic” to see if the definition matched my experience when I show up in a “killer indifferentist” strategy!
American Heritage Dictionary – Cynic:
#1 A person who believes all people are motivated by selfishness.
#2 A person whose outlook is scornfully and often habitually negative.
Definition #2 appears to me as the state of being that results from definition #1.
My Cynical logic assumes that if all people are motivated by selfishness then they will always choose selfishly. Given this assumption I understand the scornful attitude habitual negativity that would naturally result from a conversation of this nature.
Being “habitually negative” means that I basically don’t ever believe anything can turn out at all. The natrual conclusion from there is “so why bother ever trying to contribute to something working for somebody esle?” (Indifference)
So, when I meet somebody who not only believes thingd can work out, but willing to believe with me (Community). I naturally find myself suspecting them and feeling threatened by the potential betrayal! Cynical wisdom assumes there is no winning in life so the most we can do is play not to lose, to protect myself from that “eventual” reality and push people away or withdraw somehow. Because people will and are choosing selfishly. Better to betray them before they betray me. I never have to be disappointed again.
Cynicism seems to be the experience of complete despair and isolation resulting from being certain that the future is determined by the past! Consequently, suspicion causes me to anticipate evil with little to no evidence thinking I am protecting myself from, my family and my community when actually I am buying more and more of what I don’t want for a price I never intended to pay! I am getting “thrown under the bus” in life!
Dan
We use an expression, “I bought the farm,” meaning I purchase a car thinking it was this real honey and it turns out to be lemonsville, AND there is nothing I can do about it. I got screwed; I bought the farm.
Something you said really grabbed me “Cynical wisdom assumes there is no winning in life so the most we can do is play not to lose, to protect myself from that “eventual” reality and push people away or withdraw somehow. Because people will and are choosing selfishly. Better to betray them before they betray me. I never have to be disappointed again.”
“Cynical wisdom” – that is almost an oxymoron, and yet it is dead-nuts on. Wow, we are such wise people.
With our cynical wisdom, we not only get “thrown under the bus” in life, we are also buying the farm on a daily basis. Ironically, and moronically, the “farm we are buying” in failed relationships is a farm that we each create, design and build and then buy ourselves. We create and buy into our relational demise.
And here I thought everybody else are the real turkeys in life…
An ancient poetic verse comes to my mind that seems to fit here: “The heart is deceitful above all things, and is desparately wicked; who can know it?”
Whoever wrote that sure knew what they were talking about.
I read a couple blogs and they were very thought provoking. Great Job!
One Opportunity Not Given to Cynicism – A Personal Experience
Thank you for inviting us to share.
Cynicism appears on my radar screen as fear based.
God has not given us a spirit of fear, (that came from the enemy, aka, liar), but God has given us the Spirit of love, power and a sound mind / self control.
Thus cynicism (inward protection), from my understanding can be overcome with love (Agape – outward flow).
Those who believe according to past negative experience (either what they have produced or has been projected upon them), as being repeatable, and not by the word of God.
We are called to be believers.
Love hopes all things – so where does cynicism allow hope to glow in the heart. There might have been the extinguishing or calling into account the primordial faith.
Faith is the substance (an actual substance or deposit within us) of things hoped for and the evidence of things not (yet) seen.
Love seems to be the essence of God, what He is all about, though loving someone can be seen in various expressions.
As I went through a very difficult and painful experience, the Lord laid on my heart ‘Love.’ Thus all that was going to happen within my power was going to be done in patience, gentleness, self-control, etc. The amazingly detailed description given in 1Cor 13, each action was going to be weighed against this plumbline of choice, (not feelings, for at the time they were crushed).
As I, when I had all evidence that the situation could turn out for the worst, ie cynical perspective, I chose to believe (be and live) the conclusion of love – LOVE NEVER FAILS.
When I went forth, I was quickly instructed that I would have no expectation, even though I obeyed to do all in love, an outward expression, without expecting anything in return.
The expression of God being love, as His Word, didn’t fail.
I prayed, waited and God proved Himself faithful. Love never fails and He didn’t.
Going through the process I was called to trust God. Not to trust God for a desired outcome, but to trust God. It was a place of surrender, knowing that He is true to His Word / Conversation, Romans 8:28 God works all things together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.
During the time of abandonment and trusting the Lord, I experienced God Himself as described in Revelation 4 – ‘Come up higher…’ I saw clearly, as the sea of glass, I came under the power of the Holy Spirit, I experienced the One seated on the throne, I heard from the 7 fold Spirit of God (Isaiah 11:2). Available was wisdom and understanding, counsel and might, fear of the Lord (not of man, and not of the situation) illuminated / ignited by the Holy Spirit.
This was the most blessed time of the whole ordeal, being with Him. This is where I received another revelation. The meat of our walk/conversation with the Lord is not reaching the blessings, and in actuality discovered the meat of life is truly walking with the Lord, and the blessings are evidence of His ways being much higher than my ways.
The one having been moved by cynicism, instead, received revelation in God’s time and God did in fact work everything out for good.
There were some important elements I sensed to point out. I was called to obedience, trust, total abandonment, faith and hope.
Faith, hope and love, but the greatest gift is love. Love is a gift of the Spirit as well as a fruit of the Spirit. Hmm…
Cynicism seems to encapsulate the mistrust so rampant in our culture and beyond. Being “thrown under the bus” maybe is a beginning for the further, “I’ll throw you under the bus before I get thrown under the bus”. I agree, questions like “Where is the bus going?” or even “Where did the bus come from?” maybe “Why are we surrounding ourselves and lives with the threat of the bus?”. All these questions are important and nuanced only slightly to reveal just what we might be inclined to center our lives on in cynicism.
Great thoughts on this!
Mia
Thank you so much for who you are choosing to be – I get your love and your passion to be present in life rather than escape through cynicism.
I have to say a big YEEEES!!! to your journey of being in God’s presence, and looking for him through the Scriptures. Your words inspire me.
Here’s a little goodie I think you’ll appreciate. You made the statement:
“Love seems to be the essence of God, what He is all about, though loving someone can be seen in various expressions.”
I’ve recently added to the essence of God the term abundance. For me, this is the essence of abundance: being, collaborating, creativity, and enjoying. Do you think that this also is an apt description of God and of love?
Greg
Do you think you could draw a cartoon that would somehow capture the nuance of all your questions surrounding the bus?
Your blog of questions created some hilarious images in my mind. What are we crazy human beings up to???
Oh! Great job!
Very good and actual post.
Thx, your blog in my Google reader now